Creating Thirst Thursdays

As I mentioned in the inaugural post of Creating Thirst Thursdays,  as a homeschool mother, I know that I often place a great deal of pressure on myself, and on my children. I often feel that we have to academically exceed our peers. That the children's behavior must always be exemplary, and that we as a family must not have any stresses or issues. Because the world is looking at us,  as homeschoolers, and if we have any problems, many people on the outside, will attribute them to homeschooling. That is a great deal of pressure for a family, let alone a child to be under.

The truth of the matter is that we are a regular family with regular issues, and we would have these regular issues whether our children were enrolled in school, or homeschooled.  However, I may know that in my head, I at times succumb  to the pressures.. which means I have high expectations of my children.  And when that happens, you ( I ) can be a parent that is so busy correcting, teaching, guiding, molding, that you (we)  are not taking the time to actually enjoy your child. Often times, our children, will begin to feel like that they cannot do anything right, because we are always wanting to guide them. It's like that saying , "You cannot see the forest for the trees."  We can sometimes get so involved that we cannot see all the good things that our kids are doing.

When was the last time you complimented your child, and meant it?

This week, your assignment is to spend time just 'hanging out' with your child/ren. Playing games, out in the park, swimming, engaging in something. No fixing, no correcting.. spend time talking to your child about what is important to THEM. The goal here is nurture deeper conversation with your child. If this is new for you and your child, this may take some time. Don't give up, just keep at it. Keep your defenses down, and allow them to talk to you, without worry of repercussions.

Next, take this same idea to the next level. Not only, are you not going to fix them, you are going to concentrate on all the things that you are proud of. What have they accomplished lately? What is it about them, that makes you proud? Tell them! Make these times a routine. By doing that, your child will begin to drop their walls, they will trust you, feel safe to be who God created them to be, not who YOU think they should be. I will be praying for all of you. I pray that something here will help you and your child connect in a more meaningful way. I would love to hear about it.. leave me some comments! God Bless you and your family.

Creating Thirst Thursdays: Conflict

Do you have teenagers? Or have you already raised teenagers? Boy, raising teenagers is quite an adventure. One that isn't rivaled by anything that I have ever experienced.. not even being a teenager!   In our home, we have 4 teenagers.. and one pre-teenager.

How do you and your teenager handle conflict? Do you let those feelings go unresolved? Or do you take the time to handle them?  Unresolved conflict does not just 'go away'. If left alone, it will take root, a root of bitterness. In both you and your child.

One thing that we have put into practice since the children were small is, when we have conflict.. we talk about it!! Sometimes, much to my children's chagrin! It's not always easy, but it is necessary. Our children need to have the opportunity to express themselves, but even more than that, they need to have the experience of working through those tough feelings.  After all, the time that our children are spending in our home, is their training ground. They are learning how to handle conflict in their future relationships.

As you spend the time talking with your children, you will be knitting their heart to yours. They will be thankful that you have listened to them. When your children feel that they have the ability to talk to you, open and honestly, you are helping to create thirst. Thirst for safe, healthy, loving relationships. What a gift!

How will you know know that you have resolved the conflict? When you can pray together, hug each other, and laugh together. Take the opportunity to knit your hearts together with your children, through the conflict, and talk it through with your kids.

Praying that God blesses you and your family!

 

Creating Thirst Thursdays

If you haven't been following Creating Thirst Thursdays, click here to read the inaugural post.  Here is a snippet of that post...

I recently heard a message that has profoundly changed my life!  We have all heard the saying  ” You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make them drink.”     That is, unless you ” Salt the oats!”  What is it that you are doing to create thirst for your children?  Thirst for their Savior? Thirst for knowledge, Thirst for service?

That little quote has begun to reshape how I look at parenting.

 

Part of creating thirst in our children, include creating thirst for their family. In today's culture, many children grow up and want to high tail it out of their home, never looking back.

What are you doing to create thirst for family? Creating a desire to be around the family that the Lord has blessed them with?

When I first became a parent, I heard over and over, it's not the quantity of time you spend with your children, it is the quality of the time you spend with them.  Bah Humbug is what I say about that.

Don't our children deserve the best? They deserve our quantity and our quality time! What does that mean? How does that translate?

First, play with your children! You need to spend time with them. Not just simply exist with them! Take an evening, or an afternoon, every single week (or more) and just play... board games, sports, roller skating.... whatever it is your family enjoys together.

So many times we get so wrapped up in the busyness of our lives that we forget to actually take the time to enjoy each others company.. times where we can be silly, and tell stories, and make memories! Not expensive memories, but the most valuable memories!

The next thing you should do is serve with your children. Now, there should be an element of service to each other that happens within your own family, however, that is not what I am talking about. I mean to actually get out and serve others.  One way you can do that is by serving at your local church together as a family. Now, our family serves at our local church weekly. Several of our family members work in the children's ministries, while several also sing in the choir.

We also have opportunities at our church to serve together as a family. We serve together during several special events at the church that happen several times a year.  In addition, we as a family have had the opportunity to serve at a local Christian Camp that reaches out to children from the inner city. We worked for them during their winter camp. It was an amazing time. We have decided that this will be something that our family will be doing each year. We were able to serve side by side for a common purpose.

When we serve together as a family, as well as, consistently serve in our individual ministries we are working together for a common good. It helps to define what our family stands for, what we represent.

If you look at what we have covered so far, from last week and this week, we have learned that when creating thirst in your children, we need to bathe them in prayer, and pray with them, and we need to spend time with them, both working and playing!

Take some time this week and enjoy those children that God has blessed you with!

How to Create Thirst Thursdays!

I recently heard a message that has profoundly changed my life!  We have all heard the saying  " You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink."     That is, unless you " Salt the oats!"  What is it that you are doing to create thirst for your children?  Thirst for their Savior? Thirst for knowledge, Thirst for service?

That little quote has begun to reshape how I look at parenting.

 

As homeschool parents... moms, ( speaking for myself) we tend to put a lot of pressure on ourselves. I know that I feel as though I am responsible for my children's academic well being, emotional well being, spiritual well being, and social well being..  and that carries  quite a lot of weight!  I feel the pressure to make every moment a teaching moment. Which can be a wonderful thing, however, the flip side of that is that I am not showing them much grace if I am always correcting them.

So how is it that we can create thirst in our children, while still directing their path, and growing them in the way they should go?

I think we first need to start with prayer! First, we need to be in prayer ourselves. We need to pray for our own heart, and then for the heart of our children. We need to bathe our relationship with our children in prayer. Seeking the Holy Spirit to help guide us as we seek to raise up children who will love, honor and serve Him!  We should also be praying with our children. This simple action will do more for knitting your hearts together! I have heard it said, so many times, " A family that prays together, stays together".  I will tell you, I have older children, we do not 'tuck' them in any longer. However, for the last several years, we pray together each night before bed, not in their bedroom, but in the living room. We affectionately call these, our prayer hugs. I have to tell you , we have done this with such consistency, that when I travel out of town we have our 'prayer hugs' over the phone.  I have even had them call me from sleep overs, so we can have our prayer hugs while they are away. I am so thankful to have this tradition with my children. It is something that they can count on. They know that I am praying for them, and exactly how I am praying for them. They will also pray for me. I love to hear my children pray for me. It does this momma's  heart good!

We also pray throughout our days.. we pray at meals, we pray during our devotional time.. and as needed throughout the day. And we take turns, everyone takes a turn, praying for the family. I must tell you, I can sense a sweeter spirit within my children when we are consistently living in a state of prayer.

In addition to this, while we are learning how to handle difficult situations that come our way, we go to the Lord in prayer together. When one of the children is having a specific struggle, we pray through it, and help them learn how to pray through it for themselves.

What I notice, is that not only do we see a softness in our children's spirit, but when you are faithful to pray, you will have a soft and tender spirit toward your children.. even on those days where nothing seems to be going how it should!

The by product of maintaining a consistent prayer life with your children, is that they will yearn to have that connection both with you, and with their Savior.

Life can be so very busy, and we can get caught up in all the to and fro with our families, but never let your family get too busy to pray! If you are too busy to pray then you are TOO BUSY!

Carve out time each day to pray with your children, let them pray for what is important to them. This, in turn, will give you a window into their heart that you otherwise would not see!

Each week, I hope to grow this topic. Looking at ways we can create thirst within our children. If you are doing something with your family to create thirst, and would like to write up a guest blog post, let me know in the comments, and we will feature your post in the upcoming weeks!

I am looking forward to learning with you and from you as we travel down this road together!

God Bless you and your family!!!